AND!

Now Will is yelling about his poopin' problem. Why does everyone in this fucking house have an issue?

So weird

Jamie again

This morning, Jamie threw himself into my parents bed and told them that he was having a poopin' problem (his words) and that he needed to drink some prune juice. He really likes prune juice. So he drank like...15 oz of prune juice this morning. He has since returned to his house and he's complaining that his stomach hurts him. I wonder why?

oh, you

Jamie was home this weekend. My mom just left to bring Jamie back to his house. She was trying to put his meds in his bag so that they wouldn't be lost and Jamie didn't want her too. He starts yelling at her "I KNOW YOUR FUCKING SHENNIGANS!"

Then my dad said that to the dog.

The inmates run this place

Things that happened all at once:

LB was imitating her cat while I said "HOLLYWOOD GET A GRIP ON YOUR LIFE" (Hollywood is the cat, by the way)

LP accused the Canadian geese outside in the river of being bad parents

THEN

LP started smacking her computer screen with a ruler and talking about how much she hated cats

and THEN

LB danced out the door

All within like...3 1/2 minutes. What the fuck? Where do I work?

PBFW's outfit today!

- purple pants

- tan tank top

- brown and pink argyle sweater

- tan cowboy boots with green tooling

- green and brown plaid Newsies-esque hat

Note: The above picture is NOT PBFW

The cat

We have a cat. His name is Oliver and he's a fatty. But adorable.

Regardless...he was out late last night, prowling around, doing cat stuff. When he finally came home, he had a dead baby mouse. I was telling my mom that he was out late cause he was killing things and she goes "well, did you praise him for bringing back the dead mouse?" and I told her that I did not. Apparently, I'm supposed to praise the cat...for being a cat. I don't get it either.

My brother also RAN OVER the dog on Monday night. She's fine, we took her to the vet, but seriously. He ran over the dog. Good thing she's cool.

Co-workers

I work with this girl Rachel and she's just fantastic. We call her "punky brewster floozy whore" or PBFW.

This is today's conversation:
Rachel is telling us about how when she was young, she would like, steal cars from her grandma nad her mom. My reply: “so you didn’t play grand theft auto the video game, you played grand theft auto in real life?”

That's right...and she is so amazing. She wears the most fantastic outfits humanly possible

And then at work

My boss (known from this moment on as "Pattycake") is at some co-op in Westchester right now. She called me literally 19 times in a row. Everytime I would answer the phone and everytime, no one would be at the other end. When I finally did talk to her, she sounded a little...drunk. Apparently my 50 year old boss was doing shots of Patron last night. I can tell today is going to be a great fucking day.

I live at the zoo and I work at the zoo.